


what id give to be a supernova

by curtwen



Category: Wizard101
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Wizards, dumbass gays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:41:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22674241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curtwen/pseuds/curtwen
Summary: Duncan's been crushing on his roommate Nolan for a while now.So what's he to do when Nolan comes back in tears?
Relationships: Duncan Grimwater/Nolan Stormgate
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	what id give to be a supernova

The past few hours without Nolan around had been… boring, put simply. Duncan was relatively all caught up with the work Malorn had assigned - not that he ever assigned much, being a student himself - and anything else he had to do was easily put off. Instead, he’d taken to reading, particularly from the fiction section of the library. It was a good hobby to pick up; time-consuming when he actually read, time-consuming when he didn’t bother. Either way, it gave him something to do. As he heard the door open, though, it became null - not that he was complaining.

“Hey roomie. How was the date with Drake?” Duncan didn’t look up as he spoke, but the slamming of the dorm room’s door was answer enough. The necromancer smirked a little, then closed the book he’d been boredly skimming through and set it aside. It was then that he looked up and saw his roommate’s face, and the smile on his own quickly fell. “Nolan? Wait, I - you know I was joking, right?”

Nolan refused to meet his eyes, his arm coming up to wipe at his face. “Yeah. I _know._ Do you think I’m stupid too?” His tone was low, and his voice shook, but every word he spat out like it was venom.

“No, I… dude, what the hell happened back there? Huh? You’re never an asshole to me without reason, so…” Duncan made a move to stand but faltered when Nolan suddenly jerked his body farther away. He sighed and settled back down on his bed. “Okay. I get it, you’re pissed.”

For reason unknown to Duncan, his statement served only to infuriate the conjurer more, and he quickly turned back around to face him. “No. No, you _don’t_ get it, Duncan. You’ve _never_ got it. You - you just - everything comes so easy to you! Spellcasting, test-taking, whatever! You were Professor Malistaire’s _favorite_ , the little teacher’s pet, but me? I feel like… like I try _so_ hard, all the time, and it just gives me nothing! Nothing I do ever works out! I try to - to tell myself otherwise, you know? Like… it’s fine that he’s leaving you alone, that’s because _he trusts you,_ or some other crap. But it’s all a lie. Because Professor Drake hates all his students, I guess, but me in particular, because I’ll never amount to anything no matter what I do and _he knows it!_ ” 

Nolan had begun to tremble halfway through his rant, and he furiously wiped at his face over and over to stifle the coming tears. He seemingly refused to meet eyes with Duncan, instead staring intently at a spot on the floor.

Duncan’s jaw was agape. He stared at the crying boy in front of him in shock, mind reeling as he processed the scene. This wasn’t Duncan’s strong suit. He’d never been good at parsing through his own feelings, let alone years’ worth of a cruel schooling system’s toll on someone else. He did stand up from the bed then, and Nolan didn’t move away, so Duncan took that as a good sign. Or maybe he didn’t feel the need to be cagey, now that he’d just exploded about his problems. Regardless, Duncan didn’t squander the opportunity, and he attempted to comfort Nolan with a hand to his shoulder. After all, he might as well try to do _something._

“It’s not that easy, you know. I mean - yeah, I don’t have it as hard as you. I don’t know many people who do, ‘cept maybe other myth kids. But it never just came to me. I was a _shitty_ necromancer to start out, you know that? Absolute garbage. At first they weren’t even sure that I’d picked the right school.” Duncan kept his eyes focused on Nolan’s face as he spoke. The other boy didn’t look up, but his expression shifted, so he continued.

“I had to bust my ass to get here. I’ve read over half of the library’s content on necromancy by now. Probably done more field practice than most other kids in my class. And that was all while Professor Malistaire was still here. And… and, you know, in the process, I’ve been a huge dick. I - I mean, some of the other students, the ones ahead of me, they used to make fun of me. Stole my mana jar a few times, said I might as well not have it if I can’t do magic.”

Nolan looked up then, eyes wide in surprise. “You never said…”

“Yeah. Pretty pathetic, right? Sad kid gets bullied, turns into a bully so he won’t feel vulnerable again. I know.” Duncan paused, collected himself. His hand shifted downward, curling around Nolan’s bicep. “But I’m on top now. I… I pushed and shoved and worked my fucking ass off to prove to people that I could be fantastic necromancer, and I am. But I’m not happy. And at this point, that’s my image. Huge self-centered jerk. Just ask Suzie.

“Point is. You shouldn’t focus on becoming the best. Not out of your peers, not in the eyes of your dickwad professor. ‘Cause, you know, success isn’t… It’s not all it’s hyped up to be.”

Spiel officially wrapped up, Duncan went silent, instinctively worrying his bottom lip. He began to worry that maybe he’d talked too much, or went way too deep, or completely misjudged the situation. It wouldn’t be the first time.

Then, Nolan started to cry again, and suddenly he was being hugged.

It took him by surprise at first - Nolan wasn’t exactly touch-averse, but he’d never really full-on hugged him. Duncan had just guessed that Nolan had learned from the other kids by now not to get too close, lest he be shit on for Duncan’s personal gain. To put it plainly, Duncan assumed that Nolan never genuinely liked being around him.

But the way the conjurer held on to him right then, like he was trying to press as close as he could, his hands curled into fists in Duncan’s robes, it all felt much too personal. Knowing how Nolan _was_ , there was no way he’d do this if he didn’t like Duncan as a person. Not with how he was holding on.

“Nolan?” Duncan spoke quietly, afraid that if he spoke too loud or too harsh, the moment would shatter and end. He brought his own arms up too, awkwardly affixing them around Nolan’s shaking torso. They stood like that for what Duncan thought was at least a few minutes until Nolan slowly moved away, but his hands remained on the necromancer’s sides. For some reason, Duncan’s heart was pounding. “Sorry,” Nolan said. “Sorry, I just… I never - I mean, obviously, but I never really knew. You just seem so confident all the time.”

“It’s… it’s fine, man. I don’t talk about it much. Um, what happened earlier? With - with Professor Drake?” Duncan asked, a bit apprehensive. He didn’t want to upset Nolan further, but he also wanted to help, and he still had no clue what happened other than Drake was a dick again.

When Nolan’s face visibly fell, he wanted for a moment to take it back, say it’s fine, he didn’t have to talk, but then he did. “Exam day. Field practice, in - in front of everyone. Took the whole class out at once. It… I… I was the _only one_ who couldn’t do it. And if the stares weren’t bad enough, Professor Drake just had to make sure I _knew_ how f-ff _fucking_ terrible I did. He just wouldn’t stop, it’s like he - he gets off on it or some crap, I don’t-” Nolan stopped abruptly as his voice started to tremble, and he shook his head. “I’m just not a good wizard. I don’t belong here.”

Duncan found himself shaking his head furiously before anything else, his hands rising without warning to cup Nolan’s cheeks. “Shut up. Just, shut up, alright? You’re a fantastic wizard, better than half those shitheads in your class. In fact, I think you could surpass that dick Drake someday, too. You _will._ ‘Cause you’re a great fucking conjurer, and a great _person_ , and - and, you know, none of them even deserve to be in your presence, let alone stand near you,” Duncan spilled, tripped over words, all in a desperate attempt to fix Nolan’s heartbreak, because when he really thought about it, he couldn’t stand seeing him like this. It hurt, almost physically, and he had no idea why. Or maybe he did, and he just really did not want to get into that.

The other boy stared at him for a minute, and Duncan considered whether or not he should move his hands because he was beginning to feel a little awkward. Rather, he was more afraid that it was awkward for Nolan. He was just staring at him, his eyes still all puffy and red, and then Duncan remembered he did in fact have his hands on his sides, which lessened his worry just a slight.

Then, suddenly, Nolan blurted out, “I’m gay, you know. I - I’m - yup, I’m gay. I don’t know why I just said that.”

_What?_

It was Duncan’s turn to stare now, floored by the very out of nowhere revelation. Nolan seemed to remember his hands, too, and he quickly pulled them away, glancing down at his cheeks where Duncan’s still held on. “I’m sorry. Um. I can leave, if you want-”

“Me, too,” Duncan interrupted, now even more shocked by himself. “I’m. I’m gay, too.” _What is going on._ The necromancer could feel his stomach churn with anxiety, which, thinking about it, he really shouldn’t have, considering Nolan, who was also gay. But everything happened all weird and sudden and his brain still wasn’t quite caught up. Part of him was in denial, actually, because the odds of his roommate and definitely-not-crush also being gay? Very slim.

Yet there they were.

Nolan cleared his throat, glanced to the floor then back to Duncan, and then asked, “Can… can I hug you? Uh, not - not in a weird way, I just… your pep talk. And everything.”

The implication of “ _not in a weird way_ ” hit him, and he could tell immediately why Nolan would say that kind of thing, because reasonably Duncan knew he would too. He nodded, then initiated a hug, moving his hands away to instead hold tightly on to Nolan’s back. The conjurer returned it, hesitant at first, before melting into it just the way he had been before.

Duncan could feel his pulse in his ears, booming loud, and he wanted to say something. Say _it._ He only wished he knew how. He bit his lip, peeled skin off, then repeated, a nervous habit he couldn’t break. Never enough to bleed, always enough to leave his lips feeling weird.

He felt the grip on his back tighten slightly, and he inhaled.

“I like you,” the two boys said in unison.

They both flung backwards out of the hug so fast their heads smacked against each other, and Duncan let out a yelp, shifting backwards until his back hit the side of the bed. Nolan groaned, hand moving up to rub at his head. “Ow,” he said in a small voice.

“You serious?” Duncan asked incredulously, then winced as his tone did not reflect what he meant by that. “I mean - you really do? Me? As in… _like_ like?”

Nolan nodded slowly, hesitantly meeting his eyes.

In response, Duncan… had no clue what to do. Truth be told, he’d never dated anyone before. No one had ever been interested, partly his own fault, and even if there was someone, it was probably a girl, which was off the table. In short, he was completely clueless. 

“What do we do?” he asked.

Nolan looked just as baffled as he. He then shifted on his feet, shook out his hand a little, and spoke up quietly, “Should we, um… be a… you know, be a… thing?”

“I - Do you want to?”

“You know, I’m pretty sure it’s like, a mutual ‘want to.’”

“Well, um. If you want to, then… I would, also… want to.” Duncan’s speech was choppy and awkward, but he didn’t sweat it, because so was Nolan’s. The conjurer gave him a look for his response, which he didn’t totally understand.

“Duncan, you - I want to, yes, but you gotta also want to on your own. Not just to make me happy or something,” Nolan protested, arms crossing.

“Okay, okay. Yes. Yeah, I do want to. On my own. Separate of you. I do.”

That seemed to convince Nolan, who nodded. “Good.” He kept up a serious-looking face for about a solid second before it broke, and he looked panicked again. “Wait, I… Okay, this all kind of happened really fast, and I’m still not sure what this, like, means for us. Us. That sounds so weird to say.”

“You know, actually, I don’t either. Uh, weren’t you just having a breakdown a minute ago?” Duncan’s words all kind of tumbled out, and in retrospect that wasn’t what he _meant_ to say - or, well, at least not like that - but he did, and he and Nolan stared at each other just as awkwardly as before.

Nolan broke the silence, his voice slightly high-pitched. “W-Well… yes… But, then I said I was gay and you did too and now we’re a thing I think so I’m not really sure what’s happening?”

There was another moment of silence, and Duncan thought that if one of them was a storm wizard there would no doubt be a heavy cloud in the room. Then, suddenly, he started laughing. Truth be told, even he wasn’t actually sure _why,_ but he laughed like he’d just been told the funniest joke in the world.

“Wh - hey, Duncan, why are you laughing?” Nolan cried, now very panicked, but Duncan couldn’t even respond immediately. The laughter ceased soon after, though, and the necromancer took in a breath.

“God, I don’t even know why. This is all just… so _fuckin’ weird_ . You know? Like… jeez, how long have I had a crush on you? At least a solid year? And _now_ is when something happens? I guess I owe Professor Drake a solid for this one,” Duncan wheezes, and he almost laughs again before realizing what he’d just admitted.

_Aw shit._

Nolan stared at him like a deer in the headlights, and if his face hadn’t been red before, it definitely was then. “A _year?_ ” he squeaked, hand moving to anxiously fiddle with his other sleeve.

“...Maybe?” 

As if suddenly unwound, Nolan burst out, “Why didn’t you tell me? Actually, I know _why_ you didn’t, but - urgh, I still wish you had! What the hell? How have you liked me for that long? Or at all? How have I not _known?_ Duncan, _how_ did I not know?” At the end of his small outburst, he seemed to droop, looking up at Duncan with puppy eyes. “Please tell me.”

Duncan was taken aback, though a small, nervous smile made its way to his face. “Uh… because I was good at hiding it? I mean. I don’t know how half these people feel about gays. I do know how a couple people do, and…” His expression went sour for a moment as he ‘reminisced,’ then returned to the half-smile he held before. “I just wasn’t sure if it would’ve been okay. With you.”

“Are you _kidding?_ How did _I_ hide it that well? I’ve known I was gay since, like, before I even enrolled. And I’ve liked _you_ since… well… honestly, I don’t remember, but a pretty long time! Seriously, how did you never notice that?!” Nolan spoke in a rush, words almost slurring together in his eagerness to get them out.

It made Duncan stop and think, though. How _did_ he not notice? Nolan had always been like an open book. Sometimes, without even realizing it, or intending to. And yet… Duncan had never known. Was it that he was too dull to see it? Or perhaps, the whole time he’d instead forced himself to believe there was no way?

It was a bit pathetic, but he figured it was probably the latter.

Duncan didn’t say that, though. Instead, when he spoke again, it was slow and deliberate. “Well… No matter the cracks in both of our gaydars. I think… it’s a good thing that we finally both know. Isn’t it?” He looked up at Nolan, their eyes meeting. Duncan could see so many different emotions all swirling around in Nolan’s irises, most of which he assumed were also shown in his own. His stomach churned as the night’s events were slowly catching back up to him. For a moment, he wondered if Nolan felt the same.

Then, he saw Nolan nod, slow at first, then quick and intent. “Yes. You’re _right._ It doesn’t matter… whatever we didn’t know before. And… you know what? It doesn’t matter what the other students think. It doesn’t matter what they think of us, together or separate. It doesn’t matter what some stuffy, asshole, emotionally stunted teacher thinks either! None of them matter!” His voice rose in volume and intensity, and by the end of it he’d grabbed Duncan’s hands in his own, now suddenly very close to the necromancer.

_...What’s happening? Again?_

Duncan chuckled nervously, lowering their hands. “Okay, hotshot, let’s cool it down a little. It kind of does matter what they think, sometimes.” He paused. “...But, I like how you’re thinking. You know, if you want to… when you’re ready. We can tell people. I mean, we have to figure everything out between us first, but… if you really want to stick it. We can. Aaand we can also throw shit at Drake’s cottage.”

“Of course.” Nolan stopped, looking down at their still-clasped hands. Carefully, he ran his thumb over Duncan’s knuckles, breath held nervously, the sensation still new. “Duncan… um… I really… you know, I really - uh - like you. I really do.”

Duncan stared at him for a moment, then broke out in a grin. “Yeah, love you too, _Myth_ gate.”

Nolan shrieked, and their hold was broken, and suddenly a pillow was launched at Duncan’s head, but he didn’t really mind. After all, he was with the boy he’d been stupidly in love with for a solid year. Actually _with him._ At least for that night, nothing could really dampen his mood.

(When he first kissed Nolan, he was lucky that the boy wasn’t a pyromancer, because he was certain he would’ve burst into flame.)

(When Nolan first kissed back, he understood how it felt.)

“Hey, you suck at pillowfighting, by the way.”

“Shut _up,_ Duncan!”

(He definitely understood.)

**Author's Note:**

> NPC backstories are whatever i wish them to be
> 
> hi gamers im just having a lot of feelings about them. j..just take it


End file.
